{"id":15218,"date":"2013-05-24T08:00:13","date_gmt":"2013-05-24T14:00:13","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/dailyimprovisations.com\/?p=15218"},"modified":"2013-05-15T14:15:36","modified_gmt":"2013-05-15T20:15:36","slug":"helpless-female-organizes-the-garage","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/dailyimprovisations.com\/helpless-female-organizes-the-garage\/","title":{"rendered":"Helpless Female Organizes the Garage"},"content":{"rendered":"
\"this<\/a>
this is actually progress<\/figcaption><\/figure>\n

When most people<\/strong> think about organizing a room, it might sound like a project, but it’s one that can be done in a step-by-step process. \u00a0For women, it usually involves rooms wherein they know what most of the items are AND they can lift most of those items without thinking too hard about it. \u00a0Also, decisions about tossing things doesn’t really matter to anyone else. \u00a0The kitchen? \u00a0No problem. \u00a0The sewing room. \u00a0Almost fun. \u00a0The garage? \u00a0None of the above.<\/p>\n

\"We<\/a>
We probably won’t need to buy nails for the remainder of our lives<\/figcaption><\/figure>\n

 <\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

If a garage re-org<\/strong> is kicked off with a termite extermination (which I describe in this article)<\/em><\/a><\/span>, it makes it even more chaotic. \u00a0Typically, you find out there are termites and want to treat asap, so must move fast to accommodate the treatment methods. \u00a0This means quickly piling everything in the middle of the garage, so that the exterminator can drill into the cement every foot around the perimeter. \u00a0Fortunately, or unfortunately, depending on which end of the project I am dealing with, I had help with the piling. \u00a0My strapping adult sons helped move all manner of things out of corners that hadn’t been exposed for years. \u00a0They did manage to take some things out to other locations, but what was left was daunting.<\/p>\n

I’m not sure<\/strong> how it was that all of this was moved for the exterminator, but yet when it was over there was virtually no way to move around in the garage. \u00a0Even being able to levitate would have hardly made a difference. \u00a0For a few weeks, I would avert my eyes when I had to pass through. \u00a0Finally, I came to grips with the fact that I was going to have to do it. \u00a0The husband, mighty as he is, would not be able to do much with one arm in a sling.<\/p>\n

Part of my psychosis<\/strong> when it’s comes to cleaning the garage is that it means using the shop vac. \u00a0It is a monster that knows my weaknesses. \u00a0It taunts me by pretending cooperation, then spews dust at me or lifts pieces of dirt laden garage carpet to slap me in the lungs with debris. \u00a0It is a horrible creature. \u00a0Of course, it never shows this side of it’s personality when my husband or the kids are using it. \u00a0THEY think I’m making it all up. \u00a0hmpf.<\/p>\n

\"the<\/a>
the generator and the electric keyboard plotting against me<\/figcaption><\/figure>\n

Then, there is<\/strong> coming across creatures that I didn’t know existed, which I was happier not knowing about. \u00a0There are different alien species that live in the garage. \u00a0They have cloaking powers, but leave behind foul smelling substances. \u00a0I suppose dealing with those specters and their guardians (spiders that somehow escaped the swamp where extra large insects grow), made it a little easier to deal with the partially shattered ancient deer skull that had landed on the floor in front of the refrigerator. \u00a0Have I ever said I wanted to be a pioneer woman? \u00a0I don’t think so.<\/em><\/p>\n

I got help<\/strong> moving the old dryer and freezer. \u00a0Do you know what sound a dryer makes as it rubs along the cement? \u00a0We couldn’t move it 2 inches at a time, because the sound MADE me do a little dance and chant. \u00a0I tried to control myself. \u00a0If I ever get taken for torture, don’t let them subject me to this noise while tied down and gagged. \u00a0My mind will unravel.<\/p>\n

\"I<\/a>
I could barely slide the blue bin of rocks into its new home<\/figcaption><\/figure>\n

I have carefully<\/strong> put away my husband’s multiple containers of rocks. \u00a0He loves rocks. \u00a0Rocks are heavy. \u00a0I haven’t yet figured out how to stash the generator. \u00a0Well, maybe I have given up thinking about it for a while. \u00a0Generators are heavy, too. \u00a0Then, there are the boxes of special, someday useful nails. \u00a0These are not small boxes. \u00a0I’m sure they don’t sell this size of box of nails to women. \u00a0They don’t say it’s because they are women, because that’s illegal. \u00a0But it’s practical, so I’m behind them on this one.<\/p>\n

I understand<\/strong> that a garage is a good theory, but I don’t think it works well in reality. \u00a0Not my reality, anyway. \u00a0Maybe if I just go ahead and accept the fact that it is part of an alternate universe, I can venture out and finish organizing it. \u00a0The land where shop vacs are alive and carpets fly.<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

When most people think about organizing a room, it might sound like a project, but it’s one that can be done in a step-by-step process. \u00a0For women, it usually involves rooms wherein they know what most of the items are AND they can lift most of those items without thinking too hard about it. \u00a0Also, […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_genesis_hide_title":false,"_genesis_hide_breadcrumbs":false,"_genesis_hide_singular_image":false,"_genesis_hide_footer_widgets":false,"_genesis_custom_body_class":"","_genesis_custom_post_class":"","_genesis_layout":"","footnotes":""},"categories":[26,19,20],"tags":[35,40],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/dailyimprovisations.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/15218"}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/dailyimprovisations.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/dailyimprovisations.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/dailyimprovisations.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/dailyimprovisations.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=15218"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/dailyimprovisations.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/15218\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/dailyimprovisations.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=15218"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/dailyimprovisations.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=15218"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/dailyimprovisations.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=15218"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}